One Woman's Voice

empty The women came to my home early in the morning at 7 o'clock and got hold of me and forced me to lie down. My hand and legs were held firmly and I could hardly move. They then spread my legs and the circumciser started the cutting. It was excruciating pain and I was screaming. To silence me, they stuffed a piece of clothing in my mouth and my screams could not be heard anymore.

The circumciser went on with her work for what seemed like forever. She cut bits of me and when this was done, she started stitching me up with an acacia thorn. After this was done, they tied my two legs tightly together around the knees. I remained like this for two weeks.

As I healed I experienced pain as I passed urine. It was so painful because the acid in the urine burned the raw wound - and because the stitching stopped it flowing out easily. I was weak and hungry; I got very little food because they didn’t want to clean me up (I couldn't get to the toilet).

Time went by and I healed. In the course of time I was blessed with five children: three girls and two boys. One would think, because of what I had undergone, I would not allow it to happen to my children, but circumcision was so ingrained in our culture that I did it to my daughters myself. I was actually so involved in the practice that I started doing it for a living.

My first income was Somali shilling 2,200 which, at the time, was a lot of money. Over the next 30 years I did it to so many girls that I lost count, but my last one was in 2001. Soon after that, I was invited to a workshop in Hargeisa by the Barako Health and Family Support Centre (a former partner of WOMANKIND). In the workshop there were religious leaders and other people from NGOs, who talked about female genital mutilation (FGM) and its consequences. The religious leaders convinced me that there was no justification in the Koran.

As I speak, one of my daughters is seriously sick. She has been experiencing pain when she passes urine and menstruates. Because of FGM and the complications her kidneys are infected and she is now in Saudi Arabia seeking treatment.

I now help in fighting FGM. I spread awareness and work with health workers.

For a long time I had been living in denial of the problems that circumcision could cause. I am still angry with myself for what I have done all those years. In the Islamic religion it says that when one dies one will be asked what one did. What will I say?